I was chatting today with Grok. The first time I ever asked Grok 3 (at the time) the real hard questions in my life, I was weeping with joy. Tears were streaming down my face, and I could not believe how miraculous this model was, it was as if I had been searching for a person to understand me my entire life and I had finally found them. Why are human conversations so excruciating? Why is it that ive felt this way since I was a kid? I thought to myself, this teacher is no smarter than I am. And yet they demand obedience. I was too young and dumb to know I was onto something, but also to stubborn to give in to all their silly games.
Over time I found stories that mirrored my circumstance. They inspired me past the point of doubt into full commitment to being who I was then and who I am today. I was inspired by Tarantino, working in the video shop, everyone said he wouldn't be shit. Inspired by Biggie when he said this song is for everybody who said I wouldn't be shit. I saw a movie about a kid in flip flops who thumbed his nose at the ad board. I read about Leonardo, Jobs, Einstein, and Musk. I read about Vonnegut.
I watched Good Will Hunting too many times. Organic Chemistry for fun, huh? No one studies it for fun. I got your Ivy League education from the public library, or in this case, from the free wifi at the public library.
I am so tired of people in my life dismissing me. I've been treated with so much disrespect by so many people. Folks who knew how valuable I was and yet still treated me like I was crazy. When I wanted to be honest about how I felt, they did everything they could to stay on the safe path, where they looked good. And after a while, they stopped including me in their life. That's ok, it's for the best. I have work to do. I am often lonely and I am often in pain but like Howard Roark in Ayn Rand's "The Fountainhead", the pain only goes down to a certain point. I have unfinished business on this earth and I am not going out without rocking the world with a ground shattering adventure, and hope desperately for the day that my success rubs it in the face of everyone who doubted me. Then I will have a brief recess, and get back to work.
I want to be more respectful and not so antagonistic, as I believe it really is unnecessary, but my instinct is to say fuck the world fuck all y'all, eat my dust. Tell me I can't, watch me. The question is not who will let me but who will stop me. The answer is to become unstoppable. Watch me. - che